ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?

My kids are terrified of the dark. I don’t know why, or who taught them that it’s okay to be afraid of the dark. I actually prefer a dark house at night, so I know it wasn’t me. It’s frustrating, though, arguing with them over how much the door needs to be cracked at night as I put them to bed. When I’m frustrated with my kids, I often think about how God the Father would react to me in my silly fears. God never taught me to be insecure, though I am. He forgives our sins, but I still relive my past mistakes. These struggles often tempt me to lead out of fear. I think, “I don’t want them to make the same mistakes I did,” or “What if they end up in a scenario that they don’t know how to get out of?” or “If I don’t toughen them up now, they won’t be able to handle what the world will throw at them.” Most of these arguments are founded in fear. Whether it’s the fear of the unknown for them or the fear of repeating the same mistakes. Like it or not, we often will see ourselves in our children. For some of us, that absolutely terrifies us.

So how do we get out? While we were not given a manual on how to raise our kids, God has given us a manual on how to lead ourselves well.

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”
2 Timothy 1:7 NLT

Some of us have operated in fear for so long that we don’t know what life would look like without it. When we focus on the fear, it will only breed more fear. Fear of our children’s future, fear of not being in control, or maybe even the fear of being left behind. If we focus on fear, the terror will grow, and the arguments for those fears will get stronger and louder.

This verse also mentions “timidity.” Have you ever been afraid to talk to your kids? Or afraid to say what needs to be said? What about breaching conversations with your children that you have never had before?

I love this verse because it clearly tells us what God has given us, and that He’s empowered us to act in it. Let’s boldly open these conversational doors. Let’s confidently say what needs to be said as parents. Don’t just go in “guns-a-blazin” but let’s lead the way the Bible says, with power, love, and self-discipline.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us…
Ephesians 3:20 NLT

When we focus on the power of God that He’s given us, we can see that there is nothing that can stand in our way. With His power, we can do immeasurably more that we could ask or think. 1 Corinthians 13 describes God’s love. It also shows us how we can walk in love with our children. With patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, the list goes on. Lastly, God empowers us to be self-disciplined. We don’t understand self-discipline until we submit ourselves to the discipline of our Father. Hebrews 12 talks about how important discipline is from God the Father, and relates it to the discipline we receive as children.

God wants to take our children further than we could ask, think, or imagine with His power, and we will see this happen as we use God’s love in the midst of disciplining our children. This means we no longer need to lead our families from a place of fear, but instead we can walk in the spirit of power, love, and self-discipline.